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	<title>Menopause &amp; Midlife | Niki Saunders-Fearns I Strategy &amp; Leadership Consultant and Executive Coach</title>
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	<title>Menopause &amp; Midlife | Niki Saunders-Fearns I Strategy &amp; Leadership Consultant and Executive Coach</title>
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		<title>Why High-Performing Women Are Exhausted</title>
		<link>https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/why-high-performing-women-are-exhausted-from-holding-it-all-together/</link>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Niki Saunders-Fearns]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sun, 17 May 2026 13:23:33 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Menopause & Midlife]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Performance & Leadership]]></category>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/how-long-does-menopause-last-and-why-thats-the-wrong-question-copy/</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[<p><img data-tf-not-load="1" fetchpriority="high" loading="auto" decoding="auto" width="1200" height="1500" src="https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:1200/h:1500/q:mauto/f:best/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/05/niki-saunders-menopause-leadership-blog.jpg" class="attachment-full size-full wp-post-image" alt="Niki Saunders speaking about menopause, leadership and workplace confidence" decoding="async" fetchpriority="high" srcset="https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:1200/h:1500/q:mauto/f:best/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/05/niki-saunders-menopause-leadership-blog.jpg 1200w, https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:240/h:300/q:mauto/f:best/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/05/niki-saunders-menopause-leadership-blog.jpg 240w, https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:819/h:1024/q:mauto/f:best/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/05/niki-saunders-menopause-leadership-blog.jpg 819w, https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:768/h:960/q:mauto/f:best/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/05/niki-saunders-menopause-leadership-blog.jpg 768w, https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:239/h:300/q:mauto/f:best/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/05/niki-saunders-menopause-leadership-blog.jpg 239w, https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:1200/h:1500/q:mauto/f:best/dpr:2/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/05/niki-saunders-menopause-leadership-blog.jpg 2x" sizes="(max-width: 1200px) 100vw, 1200px" /></p>
<p>I could just post the polished version. The finished makeup.The black tie dress.The glamorous photos. And don’t get me wrong…I love getting dressed up. And I love to look good. But if I only ever showed the polished version of myself online, how could the women I work with ever really trust me? Because coaching [&#8230;]</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/why-high-performing-women-are-exhausted-from-holding-it-all-together/">Why High-Performing Women Are Exhausted</a> appeared first on <a href="https://nikisaunderscoaching.com">Niki Saunders-Fearns I Strategy &amp; Leadership Consultant and Executive Coach</a>.</p>
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	Why High-Performing Women Are Exhausted	</h1></div>
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        <p>I could just post the polished version.</p>
<p>The finished makeup.<br>The black tie dress.<br>The glamorous photos.</p>
<p>And don’t get me wrong…I love getting dressed up. And I love to look good.</p>
<p>But if I only ever showed the polished version of myself online, how could the women I work with ever really trust me?</p>
<p>Because coaching only works when people feel safe enough to tell the truth.</p>
<p>The overthinking.<br>The anxiety.<br>The self-doubt.<br>The pressure.<br>The parts they’re trying hardest to hide.</p>
<p>And if I’m constantly performing perfection online, what message does that send?</p>
<p>That they need to show up perfectly too? And pretend everything is ok? They&#8217;ve no problems? No issues with performance?</p>
<p>No thanks.</p>
<h2>High-performing women are used to holding it together</h2>
<p>This is something I see constantly with the women I work with.</p>
<p>On paper, everything still looks fine:</p>
<ul>
<li>
<p>successful career</p>
</li>
<li>
<p>capable</p>
</li>
<li>
<p>functioning</p>
</li>
<li>
<p>delivering</p>
</li>
</ul>
<p>But underneath?</p>
<p>They’re exhausted.</p>
<p>Not because they’re incapable.</p>
<p>Because they’re carrying the pressure of constantly needing to:</p>
<ul>
<li>
<p>perform</p>
</li>
<li>
<p>cope</p>
</li>
<li>
<p>stay composed</p>
</li>
<li>
<p>keep proving themselves</p>
</li>
</ul>
<p>And during perimenopause or midlife, that pressure starts costing more than it used to. </p>
<h2> </h2>    </div>
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                                    .                            </h4>
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            From the outside, everything can look fine. Internally, many high-performing women feel completely different.
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        <h2><span style="color: #c9a227; font-size: 30px; font-weight: bold; letter-spacing: -0.03em;">The problem with “coping well”</span></h2>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">Women who are high-performing are often the least likely to ask for support.</p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">Because resilience becomes identity.</p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">You become:</p>
<ul data-spread="false">
<li>the dependable one</li>
<li>the calm one</li>
<li>the one who gets things done</li>
</ul>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">So when things start to feel harder:</p>
<ul data-spread="false">
<li>brain fog</li>
<li>anxiety</li>
<li>emotional overwhelm</li>
<li>confidence dips</li>
</ul>
<p>…the instinct isn’t to pause.</p>
<p>It’s to push harder&#8230;.because lets be honest, we don&#8217;t ever want to admit we&#8217;re not Superwoman!</p>
<p><a href="https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/midlife-performance-decline/">Read my tips for performing at your best during midlife </a></p>
<h2>Why honesty matters more than polish</h2>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">Real trust is built when people feel they can stop pretending.</p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">That’s true in coaching.<br>And honestly, it’s true in life too.</p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">I’m not interested in creating a polished version of womanhood that nobody can actually relate to.</p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">I’m interested in honest conversations about:</p>
<ul data-spread="false">
<li>performance</li>
<li>confidence</li>
<li>identity</li>
<li>pressure</li>
<li>midlife</li>
<li>what happens when the strategies that used to work stop working in the same way</li>
</ul>
<div>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">Because that’s where meaningful change starts.</p>
<h2>You don’t have to hold it all together alone</h2>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">One of the biggest shifts for many women is realising:</p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">Struggling silently is not a requirement for being capable.</p>
<p>And often, the strongest thing you can do is stop pretending you’re fine when you’re not.</p>
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                                                Join me for my masterclass                                        </a>
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<!--/themify_builder_content--><p>The post <a href="https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/why-high-performing-women-are-exhausted-from-holding-it-all-together/">Why High-Performing Women Are Exhausted</a> appeared first on <a href="https://nikisaunderscoaching.com">Niki Saunders-Fearns I Strategy &amp; Leadership Consultant and Executive Coach</a>.</p>
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			</item>
		<item>
		<title>Stop Asking How Long Menopause Lasts</title>
		<link>https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/stop-asking-how-long-menopause-lasts/</link>
					<comments>https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/stop-asking-how-long-menopause-lasts/#comments</comments>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Niki Saunders-Fearns]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Tue, 05 May 2026 08:57:12 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Menopause & Midlife]]></category>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/why-your-performance-feels-different-in-midlife-and-what-to-do-about-it-copy/</guid>

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<p>Menopause itself is a single point in time, defined as 12 months without a period. However, the menopause transition can last 4–8 years, with symptoms sometimes continuing beyond that. If I had a £1 for every time I’ve been asked “how long does menopause last?”… I’d be financially independent by now. It’s one of the [&#8230;]</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/stop-asking-how-long-menopause-lasts/">Stop Asking How Long Menopause Lasts</a> appeared first on <a href="https://nikisaunderscoaching.com">Niki Saunders-Fearns I Strategy &amp; Leadership Consultant and Executive Coach</a>.</p>
]]></description>
										<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img loading="lazy" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:1080/h:1080/q:mauto/f:best/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/05/blog-image-1080-x-1080-px-2.png" class="attachment-full size-full wp-post-image" alt="Menopause timeline showing how long menopause lasts including perimenopause, menopause and postmenopause stages" decoding="async" srcset="https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:1080/h:1080/q:mauto/f:best/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/05/blog-image-1080-x-1080-px-2.png 1080w, https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:300/h:300/q:mauto/f:best/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/05/blog-image-1080-x-1080-px-2.png 300w, https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:1024/h:1024/q:mauto/f:best/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/05/blog-image-1080-x-1080-px-2.png 1024w, https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:150/h:150/q:mauto/f:best/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/05/blog-image-1080-x-1080-px-2.png 150w, https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:768/h:768/q:mauto/f:best/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/05/blog-image-1080-x-1080-px-2.png 768w, https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:350/h:350/q:mauto/f:best/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/05/blog-image-1080-x-1080-px-2.png 350w, https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:1080/h:1080/q:mauto/f:best/dpr:2/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/05/blog-image-1080-x-1080-px-2.png 2x" sizes="(max-width: 1080px) 100vw, 1080px" /></p><!--themify_builder_content-->
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	Stop Asking How Long Menopause Lasts	</h1></div>
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        <p class="isSelectedEnd">Menopause itself is a single point in time, defined as 12 months without a period. However, the menopause transition can last 4–8 years, with symptoms sometimes continuing beyond that.</p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd"><em>If I had a £1 for every time I’ve been asked “how long does menopause last?”… I’d be financially independent by now.</em></p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">It’s one of the most Googled menopause questions—and it makes sense.</p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">You want a timeline.<br>An end date.<br>A light at the end of the tunnel.</p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">So let’s start with the answer Google wants…</p>
<h2>How long does menopause last?</h2>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">Menopause itself is a <strong>single point in time</strong>—the moment you’ve gone 12 months without a period.</p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">But the <strong>menopause transition</strong> (what you’re actually feeling) typically lasts:</p>
<ul data-spread="false">
<li><strong>Perimenopause:</strong> 4–8 years</li>
<li><strong>Post-menopause symptoms:</strong> can continue for several years</li>
<li><strong>Total experience:</strong> often <strong>7–10 years</strong></li>
</ul>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">That’s the clinical reality.</p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">Now let’s talk about <span style="font-weight: bold;"><em>your</em> </span>reality.</p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">Don&#8217;t know where you are, <a class="themify_lightbox" href="https://nicola-abojbi3o.scoreapp.com">take my performance scorecard</a></p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd"><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" class="alignnone size-medium wp-image-858" src="https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:300/h:175/q:mauto/f:best/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/05/Screenshot-2026-05-05-at-10.23.01-1.png" alt="Menopause timeline showing how long menopause lasts including perimenopause, menopause and postmenopause stages" width="300" height="175" srcset="https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:300/h:175/q:mauto/f:best/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/05/Screenshot-2026-05-05-at-10.23.01-1.png 300w, https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:1200/h:698/q:mauto/f:best/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/05/Screenshot-2026-05-05-at-10.23.01-1.png 1200w, https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:704/h:410/q:mauto/f:best/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/05/Screenshot-2026-05-05-at-10.23.01-1.png 704w, https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:1200/h:698/q:mauto/f:best/dpr:2/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/05/Screenshot-2026-05-05-at-10.23.01-1.png 2x" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" /></p>
<h2>Why menopause can feel like it lasts forever</h2>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">Because no one explains this properly.</p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">Most symptoms happen during <strong>perimenopause</strong>, when hormones are fluctuating—not declining nicely and predictably.</p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">That’s why you might feel:</p>
<ul data-spread="false">
<li>Fine one week</li>
<li>Anxious the next</li>
<li>Exhausted for no clear reason</li>
<li>Like you’ve completely lost your edge</li>
</ul>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">This isn’t you “falling apart”.</p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">It’s your body trying to recalibrate.</p>
<h2>When does menopause start?</h2>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">Another common question—and one that links directly here.</p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">Perimenopause can start:</p>
<ul data-spread="false">
<li>In your early to mid-40s (sometimes earlier)</li>
<li>Even if your periods are still regular</li>
</ul>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">Which is why so many women don’t realise what’s happening.</p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">They think:</p>
<ul data-spread="false">
<li>“I’m just stressed”</li>
<li>“I’m not coping”</li>
<li>“Something’s wrong with me”</li>
</ul>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">There isn’t.</p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">But there <em>is</em> a gap in understanding.</p>
<h2>What signals the end of menopause?</h2>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">Let’s be clear—there’s no clean finish line.</p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">But signs you’re moving through it can include:</p>
<ul data-spread="false">
<li>Periods stopping completely</li>
<li>Hormones stabilising</li>
<li>Symptoms becoming less intense or more manageable</li>
</ul>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">That said, some women still experience:</p>
<ul data-spread="false">
<li>Hot flushes</li>
<li>Sleep disruption</li>
<li>Low mood</li>
</ul>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">Years later.</p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">Which brings us to the part no one challenges…</p>
<h2>Just because menopause can last years… doesn’t mean you have to feel awful for years</h2>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">This is where I push back.</p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">Because too many women are told:</p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd"><span style="font-size: 1.1em;">“It’s just menopause. You have to ride it out.”</span></p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">You don’t. <a href="https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/hidden-cost-of-pushing-through-midlife/">I talk more about this here</a></p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">Yes—this is a biological transition.</p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">But your <strong>experience of it</strong> is not fixed.</p>
<h2>What actually changes your menopause experience</h2>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">It’s not just hormones.</p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">It’s:</p>
<ul data-spread="false">
<li>Your understanding of what’s happening</li>
<li>The support you have (or don’t)</li>
<li>Stress levels</li>
<li>Sleep</li>
<li>Lifestyle</li>
<li>Whether you’ve been dismissed or properly listened to</li>
</ul>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">Because when you’re told “this is normal”—you stop looking for solutions.</p>
<h2>A better question to ask</h2>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">Instead of:</p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd"><strong>“How long does menopause last?”</strong></p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">Ask:</p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd"><strong>“How long am I willing to feel like this?”</strong></p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">Because those are two very different timelines.</p>
<h2>Final thought</h2>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">Menopause can last years.</p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">But struggling through it for years?</p>
<p class="isSelectedEnd">That’s not inevitable.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>    </div>
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<!--/themify_builder_content--><p>The post <a href="https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/stop-asking-how-long-menopause-lasts/">Stop Asking How Long Menopause Lasts</a> appeared first on <a href="https://nikisaunderscoaching.com">Niki Saunders-Fearns I Strategy &amp; Leadership Consultant and Executive Coach</a>.</p>
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		<title>The Hidden Cost of “Pushing Through”</title>
		<link>https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/hidden-cost-of-pushing-through-midlife/</link>
					<comments>https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/hidden-cost-of-pushing-through-midlife/#comments</comments>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Niki Saunders-Fearns]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 16 Apr 2026 18:17:27 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Menopause & Midlife]]></category>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/youre-not-losing-your-edge-youre-just-working-in-a-way-that-no-longer-works-copy/</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[<p><img loading="lazy" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:1080/h:1080/q:mauto/f:best/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/Niki-Saunders-Ferns-performance-and-leadership.png" class="attachment-full size-full wp-post-image" alt="Niki Saunders-Fearns, menopause coach on performance and leadership" decoding="async" srcset="https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:1080/h:1080/q:mauto/f:best/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/Niki-Saunders-Ferns-performance-and-leadership.png 1080w, https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:300/h:300/q:mauto/f:best/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/Niki-Saunders-Ferns-performance-and-leadership.png 300w, https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:1024/h:1024/q:mauto/f:best/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/Niki-Saunders-Ferns-performance-and-leadership.png 1024w, https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:150/h:150/q:mauto/f:best/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/Niki-Saunders-Ferns-performance-and-leadership.png 150w, https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:768/h:768/q:mauto/f:best/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/Niki-Saunders-Ferns-performance-and-leadership.png 768w, https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:350/h:350/q:mauto/f:best/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/Niki-Saunders-Ferns-performance-and-leadership.png 350w, https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:1080/h:1080/q:mauto/f:best/dpr:2/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/Niki-Saunders-Ferns-performance-and-leadership.png 2x" sizes="(max-width: 1080px) 100vw, 1080px" /></p>
<p>There was a point where I genuinely believed I had it all together. The hot flushes had settled. I was sleeping. I’d lost 3 stone. On paper, I looked like the picture of health. I was training regularly, eating “well” (albeit very low calorie), and doing all the things you’re told to do. So I [&#8230;]</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/hidden-cost-of-pushing-through-midlife/">The Hidden Cost of “Pushing Through”</a> appeared first on <a href="https://nikisaunderscoaching.com">Niki Saunders-Fearns I Strategy &amp; Leadership Consultant and Executive Coach</a>.</p>
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										<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img loading="lazy" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:1080/h:1080/q:mauto/f:best/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/Niki-Saunders-Ferns-performance-and-leadership.png" class="attachment-full size-full wp-post-image" alt="Niki Saunders-Fearns, menopause coach on performance and leadership" decoding="async" srcset="https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:1080/h:1080/q:mauto/f:best/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/Niki-Saunders-Ferns-performance-and-leadership.png 1080w, https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:300/h:300/q:mauto/f:best/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/Niki-Saunders-Ferns-performance-and-leadership.png 300w, https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:1024/h:1024/q:mauto/f:best/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/Niki-Saunders-Ferns-performance-and-leadership.png 1024w, https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:150/h:150/q:mauto/f:best/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/Niki-Saunders-Ferns-performance-and-leadership.png 150w, https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:768/h:768/q:mauto/f:best/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/Niki-Saunders-Ferns-performance-and-leadership.png 768w, https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:350/h:350/q:mauto/f:best/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/Niki-Saunders-Ferns-performance-and-leadership.png 350w, https://mllpmg4ox3gq.i.optimole.com/cb:WirK.b2a/w:1080/h:1080/q:mauto/f:best/dpr:2/https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/Niki-Saunders-Ferns-performance-and-leadership.png 2x" sizes="(max-width: 1080px) 100vw, 1080px" /></p><!--themify_builder_content-->
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	The Hidden Cost of “Pushing Through”	</h1></div>
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        <p id="ember51" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">There was a point where I genuinely believed I had it all together.</p>
<p id="ember52" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">The hot flushes had settled. I was sleeping. I’d lost 3 stone.</p>
<p id="ember53" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">On paper, I looked like the picture of health.</p>
<p id="ember54" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">I was training regularly, eating “well” (albeit very low calorie), and doing all the things you’re told to do.</p>
<p id="ember55" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">So I assumed I was through the worst of it.</p>
<p id="ember56" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">But something wasn’t right.</p>
<p id="ember57" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">Not physically. Mentally.</p>
<p id="ember58" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">At work, my performance felt off.</p>
<p id="ember59" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">I was forgetting tasks. My diary was a car crash. I’d open it and feel instantly overwhelmed.</p>
<p id="ember60" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">Things that had always felt easy suddenly required effort.</p>
<p id="ember61" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">I started making mistakes in emails and slide decks — something I’d never done before.</p>
<p id="ember62" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">And that hit hard.</p>
<p id="ember63" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">Because for years, I’d built my reputation on being sharp, organised and on top of things.</p>
<p id="ember64" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">Then there was the emotional side.</p>
<p id="ember65" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">I was overthinking conversations. Replaying things people had said. Questioning myself more than I ever had.</p>
<p id="ember66" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">Even small moments felt bigger than they should have.</p>
<p id="ember67" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">From the outside, everything still looked fine.</p>
<p id="ember68" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">But underneath, it didn’t feel it.</p>
<p id="ember69" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">And the conclusion I came to?</p>
<p id="ember70" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">Something’s wrong with me.</p>
<p id="ember71" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph"><b>What I didn’t understand at the time was this:</b></p>
<p id="ember72" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">My brain was under pressure.</p>
<p id="ember73" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">Even though some of the physical symptoms had eased, the cognitive and emotional impact of menopause was still very much there.</p>
<p id="ember74" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">And I hadn’t adjusted how I was working.</p>
<p id="ember75" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">I was still expecting my brain to perform in the same way it always had.</p>
<p id="ember76" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">So I pushed harder.</p>
<p id="ember77" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">Worked longer. Tried to stay in control.</p>
<p id="ember78" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">But that only made things worse.</p>
<p id="ember79" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">The shift came when I stopped trying to force my way through it and started understanding what was actually happening.</p>
<p id="ember80" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">Because once you understand the impact menopause has on the brain — on focus, memory, emotional regulation — you can start to work differently.</p>
<p id="ember81" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">You can reduce the mental load.</p>
<p id="ember82" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">You can stop overthinking everything.</p>
<p id="ember83" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">You can put simple strategies in place that allow you to feel confident, capable and in control again.</p>
<p id="ember84" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">Not by pushing harder.</p>
<p id="ember85" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">But by working smarter with what your brain actually needs.</p>
<p id="ember86" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">That’s the part no one had explained to me&#8230;.along with how long it lasts, <a href="https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/how-long-does-menopause-last/">which I talk about here</a></p>
<p id="ember87" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">And it’s the part I now help other women understand.</p>
<p id="ember88" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">Because you don’t lose your edge in midlife.</p>
<p id="ember89" class="ember-view reader-text-block__paragraph">You just need a different way of using it. <a href="https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/why-performance-feels-different-in-midlife/">And here&#8217;s how I did</a></p>    </div>
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<!--/themify_builder_content--><p>The post <a href="https://nikisaunderscoaching.com/hidden-cost-of-pushing-through-midlife/">The Hidden Cost of “Pushing Through”</a> appeared first on <a href="https://nikisaunderscoaching.com">Niki Saunders-Fearns I Strategy &amp; Leadership Consultant and Executive Coach</a>.</p>
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